It's just not cricket

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 20:35 Sat 14 Jun 2014

One 75cl bottle is the theoretical full allowance per person. But at Lord's, unlike the Oval, there is a very civilised method in operation:
"You don't have any alcohol do you?"
"No."
Bear in mind for future visits. Also remember Julian's "approx 75cl" labels could come in useful.

benread · Post by **benread** » 21:17 Sat 14 Jun 2014

It works even better as a member. That tie serves a purpose!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 21:53 Sat 14 Jun 2014

Are the Sri Lankan batsmen as attractive to watch as they used to be? Very stylish I always thought, well the good ones anyway.

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 13:33 Sun 15 Jun 2014

[Remark from Owen regarding Ian Bell's 9 to follow here]

Post by **DRT** » 14:08 Sun 15 Jun 2014

LGTrotter wrote:Are the Sri Lankan batsmen as attractive to watch as they used to be? Very stylish I always thought, well the good ones anyway.

Not as attractive as their bowling is right now.

: Screen Shot 2014-06-15 at 15.06.17.png (47.86 KiB) Viewed 3444 times

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 14:09 Sun 15 Jun 2014

djewesbury wrote:[Remark from Owen regarding Ian Bell's 9 to follow here]

OK you have drawn me into this. I feel slightly less resentful of Bells dismissal today than in the first innings, true he has once again proved his worth (about 9), but it is when he plays well in situations that count and then gets himself out without making any tangible difference. WHICH IS ALWAYS.

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 14:10 Sun 15 Jun 2014

LGTrotter wrote:Are the Sri Lankan batsmen as attractive to watch as they used to be? Very stylish I always thought, well the good ones anyway.

They played very nicely but rather slowly. Sangakkara was fluent but very watchful.

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 14:13 Sun 15 Jun 2014

My god. Ali gets a 4 with his first ball and loses his wicket with the second.

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 14:17 Sun 15 Jun 2014

Suddenly I might not have any prior engagements tomorrow morning. St John's Wood at 11 am, anyone?

Post by **jdaw1** » 14:49 Sun 15 Jun 2014

djewesbury wrote:St John's Wood at 11 am, anyone?

In theory my babysitting task will be finished. I’d have to go to TBH, leave a bottle of SV97. Then to Lords, with a ‘backup’ bottle of same, and get there by 11am. Hmm.

Permission being sought. I give it about 25% chance.

Edit: lucky me. Granted.

Post by **DRT** » 16:38 Sun 15 Jun 2014

It seems to have turned boring again.

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 16:41 Sun 15 Jun 2014

It has got interesting again! Excellent innings from Ballance. We have a decent lead and SL need to work hard tomorrow. Worth a chase for them surely. Both sides can win, that's much better than it looked yesterday.

Post by **DRT** » 17:18 Sun 15 Jun 2014

A lack of ambition from Cook methinks. Should have declared half an hour ago and got after them.

Apparently tickets to watch the draw being played out tomorrow are £20 at the gate.

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 17:21 Sun 15 Jun 2014

DRT wrote:A lack of ambition from Cook methinks. Should have declared half an hour ago and got after them.

Apparently tickets to watch the draw being played out tomorrow are £20 at the gate.

I think it's hard to call. Sangakkara and Jayawardene could drive through a last-innings run chase in the right circumstances.

JDAW and I are going to the game.

Post by **DRT** » 17:28 Sun 15 Jun 2014

djewesbury wrote:JDAW and I are going to the game.

I will be sure to check in on the blog to keep abreast of developments.

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 17:31 Sun 15 Jun 2014

Ballance to the century with a 6. There's the declaration, overnight, presumably?

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 18:46 Sun 15 Jun 2014

djewesbury wrote:
DRT wrote:A lack of ambition from Cook methinks. Should have declared half an hour ago and got after them.

Apparently tickets to watch the draw being played out tomorrow are £20 at the gate.
I think it's hard to call. Sangakkara and Jayawardene could drive through a last-innings run chase in the right circumstances.

I can't imagine the Sri Lankans going too crazy to get these runs. You have mentioned the two players who will be sworn to not getting out, if they are 280-1 about tea time they might have a swipe. #attritional.

Hard to say no if you happened to be at a loose end and nearby. Enjoy.

Post by **jdaw1** » 12:57 Mon 16 Jun 2014

The captains have misjudged this. At lunch they should have shaken hands on a draw, and agreed a 20-over quickie, the batting order being the reverse of that in the first innings. Much more fun.

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 13:00 Mon 16 Jun 2014

The man next to me clearly doesn't understand what this beautiful game of ours is all about. Honestly, to propose a childish knockabout instead of this stately procession…
"I'd feel a lot better about this game if there were six wickets just now," he just said.
Oh dearie me.

Post by **jdaw1** » 14:02 Mon 16 Jun 2014

Guilty as charged.

Glenn E. · Post by **Glenn E.** » 16:43 Mon 16 Jun 2014

LGTrotter wrote:
djewesbury wrote:All our lights are on.
But nobody's home.

Their minds are not their own.

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 17:12 Mon 16 Jun 2014

7 overs left... SL seven fer...

Go on, get one more, just to keep them honest.

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 19:35 Mon 16 Jun 2014

That was a really exciting, erm... draw.

Post by **DRT** » 07:51 Tue 17 Jun 2014

DRT wrote:A lack of ambition from Cook methinks. Should have declared half an hour ago and got after them.

my view hasn't changed. If SL had gone in a man or two down at the end of day 4 England would now be congratulating themselves of a fine tactical victory. Still, at least Roooooooot got his hundred.

Cook has no ruthless streak. Will he ever have that?

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 15:23 Tue 17 Jun 2014

DRT wrote:
DRT wrote:A lack of ambition from Cook methinks. Should have declared half an hour ago and got after them.
my view hasn't changed. If SL had gone in a man or two down at the end of day 4 England would now be congratulating themselves of a fine tactical victory. Still, at least Roooooooot got his hundred.

Cook has no ruthless streak. Will he ever have that?

I was listening to TMS and one of the commentators rather coyly saying Cook was a 'conservative' captain. It was a sort of recognition that he was no good at it and sort of a recognition that we are stuck with him.

I think Cook looks at his most awful when he is trying to look and sound ruthless, like watching Gordon Brown smile.

Of more immediate concern is his batting.

Post by **DRT** » 18:03 Tue 17 Jun 2014

LGTrotter wrote:Of more immediate concern is his batting.

I disagree. If his spinelessness as a captain was sorted out by sacking him his poor batting would cease to be a problem when he wasn't picked by his successor.

Post by **Alex Bridgeman** » 19:21 Tue 17 Jun 2014

KP for captain.

Or bring back Mike Brearley. He could never bat when captaining England so it wouldn't matter that he's now 72.

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 19:58 Tue 17 Jun 2014

AHB wrote:Or bring back Mike Brearley. He could never bat when captaining England so it wouldn't matter that he's now 72.

You will notice I have trimmed your first suggestion.

My nomination for an alternative captain on the lines of Mike Brearly would be Paul Collingwood.

Post by **DRT** » 23:55 Tue 17 Jun 2014

Give it to Rooooooooooty - some Yorkshire grit is what is needed.

Some say that Yorkshire men are Scotsmen with the generosity taken out, I like to think of them as unfortunate souls who weren't born north of the wall. Give him a chance - he might prove to have more of a spine than the prawn currently in charge.

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 00:07 Wed 18 Jun 2014

Whilst I would not wish to propagate stereotypes doesn't Root seem to have something of the Hovis boy about him?

Grit is rather too drab a necessity for England captain, you need somebody who has an instinctive grasp of situations, think the Lancastrian Vaughan.

Post by **DRT** » 00:32 Wed 18 Jun 2014

LGTrotter wrote:Whilst I would not wish to propagate stereotypes doesn't Root seem to have something of the Hovis boy about him?

If the lad can cycle up hill with a basket-full of wholemeal without blubbing like a girl he would be good enough for me.

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 21:43 Thu 19 Jun 2014

'England captain Alastair Cook has called for a crackdown on "personal" attacks on his style of leadership.' Says the beeb.

I call on Derek to get behind the England captain and to withdraw the remarks which have so undermined him.

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 21:47 Thu 19 Jun 2014

But then again whingeing that nobody loves you doesn't help. Nothing says 'needy loser' louder.

Post by **DRT** » 22:22 Thu 19 Jun 2014

Hilarious. Not only is he spineless on the pitch now he's telling his Aunty B on us.

Time for the eggs and flour...

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 07:58 Fri 20 Jun 2014

The ECB wrote:Bell, who made his debut as a fresh-faced 22-year-old against New Zealand 10 years ago, has been one of the key players in a golden era for England, which saw them win four Ashes series and become the number-one ranked Test team in the world.

During that time Bell has scored 6,787 runs at an average of 45.24, with 20 centuries and a highest score of 235 in a style that has been a delight to watch.

Form an orderly queue please.

Glenn E. · Post by **Glenn E.** » 15:11 Fri 20 Jun 2014

djewesbury wrote:
The ECB wrote:Bell, who made his debut as a fresh-faced 22-year-old against New Zealand 10 years ago, has been one of the key players in a golden era for England, which saw them win four Ashes series and become the number-one ranked Test team in the world.

How is 4/10 the "golden age" for England? Doesn't that mean Australia won 6/10?

Or is this some kind of subtle English humor?

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 15:13 Fri 20 Jun 2014

Glenn E. wrote:
djewesbury wrote:
The ECB wrote:Bell, who made his debut as a fresh-faced 22-year-old against New Zealand 10 years ago, has been one of the key players in a golden era for England, which saw them win four Ashes series and become the number-one ranked Test team in the world.
How is 4/10 the "golden age" for England? Doesn't that mean Australia won 6/10?

Or is this some kind of subtle English humor?

It's not 4/10. It's usually only played every other year (although since the seasons are out of sync, the gap is either 18 months or 30).
At the moment they are being shunted very close together in the schedule because of fixture clashes but that's an aberration.

Post by **Alex Bridgeman** » 17:13 Fri 20 Jun 2014

Stone the crows! Have you seen what's happened at Headingly? England only need another 32 runs to avoid the follow on!

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 19:45 Fri 20 Jun 2014

djewesbury wrote:
The ECB wrote:Bell, who made his debut as a fresh-faced 22-year-old against New Zealand 10 years ago, has been one of the key players in a golden era for England, which saw them win four Ashes series and become the number-one ranked Test team in the world.

During that time Bell has scored 6,787 runs at an average of 45.24, with 20 centuries and a highest score of 235 in a style that has been a delight to watch.
Form an orderly queue please.

I think I had my place at the front of this queue. I was looking at the high scores he has made on Cricinfo and then looking up the test scorecards, I am right, he has scored many runs in the valiant pursuit of his career, I have never seen him score a run when it mattered for England. There may be odd occasions where he has, please don't remind me of them. He has usually scored big when somebody else already has scored a century. He seems hapless, plucky is the kindest word associate with him. After 100 tests he still has the look of a bunny. You could throw a sausage roll in any county dressing room and hit 2 players with as much talent as him. I cannot imagine what kind of pictures of the chairman of selectors he has in numbered vault in Switzerland, but they must be dynamite. There is something about him that brings out the bully in me, which I really don't like. The most preposterous thing he has done in a long career of seeming faintly ridiculous was the cage fighting. Does anyone remember when he felt he needed to become more edgy and he went and trained in Thailand or somewhere? I haven't laughed so hard since the foreign secretary shared a bed 'to save money', he is just never going to look tasty. And then there is the MBE. And he still gets the short leg job under the lid which says to me his team mates think he's a sap too. I could go on, I'll get another drink and have a go.

I apologise in advance for all the various levels and kinds of offence I may have produced.

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 19:48 Fri 20 Jun 2014

And of all the people who talk nonsense in the post match interview he has a unique ability to stitch together cliche into a single babbling noise.

Post by **DRT** » 19:51 Fri 20 Jun 2014

LGTrotter wrote:You could throw a sausage roll in any county dressing room and hit 2 players with as much talent as him.

I wish someone would throw a sausage roll at me - haven't had one in ages

Post by **Alex Bridgeman** » 19:56 Fri 20 Jun 2014

DRT wrote:
LGTrotter wrote:You could throw a sausage roll in any county dressing room and hit 2 players with as much talent as him.
I wish someone would throw a sausage roll at me - haven't had one in ages

And that is excellent news. Make sure you eat healthily over the weekend.

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 20:22 Fri 20 Jun 2014

I think Graeme Swann did very well on TMS. A natural, he was only five minutes in there and was slagging them all off. Very dry.
Thanks Owen, I enjoyed that!

Post by **DRT** » 20:28 Fri 20 Jun 2014

I missed today's session. Did Cookie do anything stupid that I should be ranting about?

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 20:31 Fri 20 Jun 2014

DRT wrote:I missed today's session. Did Cookie do anything stupid that I should be ranting about?

Who, Ray??

No. Cook spent a good amount of time sensibly working out his position at the crease, working out where his off stump was and trying to get his technical faults corrected, as a result of which he looked far more fluid than at any time recently.

Post by **DRT** » 20:35 Fri 20 Jun 2014

Perhaps the personal insults have been taken in the spirit in which they were intended and he has taken note of the fact he has been rubbish recently?

benread · Post by **benread** » 20:37 Fri 20 Jun 2014

DRT wrote:
LGTrotter wrote:You could throw a sausage roll in any county dressing room and hit 2 players with as much talent as him.
I wish someone would throw a sausage roll at me - haven't had one in ages

There was a baby bel cheese thrown at one of the Sri Lankan fielders today!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

djewesbury · Post by **djewesbury** » 20:37 Fri 20 Jun 2014

Here's hoping. If so this could be an exciting match.

LGTrotter · Post by **LGTrotter** » 21:03 Fri 20 Jun 2014

DRT wrote:Perhaps the personal insults have been taken in the spirit in which they were intended and he has taken note of the fact he has been rubbish recently?

Here's some optimism. Cook has always looked to me like a solid England opener (rather than most of the 'Essexed' openers). He has scored a ton of runs with preternatural concentration and an amazing ability to play to his strengths. He's having a bad time, I see no reason at all why he won't come through it. In Cook we trust, no really...

Post by **DRT** » 21:32 Fri 20 Jun 2014

LGTrotter wrote:
DRT wrote:Perhaps the personal insults have been taken in the spirit in which they were intended and he has taken note of the fact he has been rubbish recently?
Here's some optimism. Cook has always looked to me like a solid England opener (rather than most of the 'Essexed' openers). He has scored a ton of runs with preternatural concentration and an amazing ability to play to his strengths. He's having a bad time, I see no reason at all why he won't come through it. In Cook we trust, no really...

Have you been drinking the drain cleaner again?