Apostrophe crimes

[DRT]

Thank you for the lesson. Perhaps in future I will make fewer errors.

Derek

[KillerB]

The total cost of £180 was subsequently shared equally by Derek T, Conky, KillerB and Overtired & emotional, the last of whom takes credit for the contribution of this bottle to the line-up.

MS = The digital devil.

I said that and you asked 'anything else?'

Are you taking the rise?

[DRT]

The total cost of £180 was subsequently shared equally by Derek T, Conky, KillerB and Overtired & emotional, the last of whom takes credit for the contribution of this bottle to the line-up.

MS = The digital devil.

I said that and you asked 'anything else?'

Are you taking the rise?

You didn't point out that I should have used a comma rather than a full stop and a new sentence

[KillerB]

The total cost of £180 was subsequently shared equally by Derek T, Conky, KillerB and Overtired & emotional, the last of whom takes credit for the contribution of this bottle to the line-up.

MS = The digital devil.

I said that and you asked 'anything else?'

Are you taking the rise?

You didn't point out that I should have used a comma rather than a full stop and a new sentence

You do need to share equally between as well.

[jdaw1]

The total cost of £180 was subsequently shared equally by Derek T, Conky, KillerB and Overtired & emotional, the last of whom takes credit for the contribution of this bottle to the line-up.

MS = The digital devil.

I said that and you asked 'anything else?'

Are you taking the rise?

You didn't point out that I should have used a comma rather than a full stop and a new sentence

You do need to share equally between as well.

I’d welcome a source for that. I am not (yet) disputing, so far just asking.

[KillerB]

The total cost of £180 was subsequently shared equally by Derek T, Conky, KillerB and Overtired & emotional, the last of whom takes credit for the contribution of this bottle to the line-up.

MS = The digital devil.

I said that and you asked 'anything else?'

Are you taking the rise?

You didn't point out that I should have used a comma rather than a full stop and a new sentence

You do need to share equally between as well.

I’d welcome a source for that. I am not (yet) disputing, so far just asking.

Well you can't 'share by' but you can 'share amongst' and 'share between'. As we have a finite number I would suggest 'share between', although I could be wrong and that that is only for two people.

[jdaw1]

You do need to share equally between as well.

I’d welcome a source for that. I am not (yet) disputing, so far just asking.

Well you can't 'share by' but you can 'share amongst' and 'share between'. As we have a finite number I would suggest 'share between', although I could be wrong and that that is only for two people.[/quote]The baby is asleep in the room containing my Fowler’s (which I think excellently prescriptive) and also my Burchfield’s (less so, as more descriptive). So I’ll pass for the moment.

Is this degenerating into a general-purpose nightmare pedant thread?

[DRT]

You do need to share equally between as well.

I’d welcome a source for that. I am not (yet) disputing, so far just asking.

Well you can't 'share by' but you can 'share amongst' and 'share between'. As we ]have a finite number I would suggest 'share between', although I could be wrong and that that is only for two people.

The baby is asleep in the room containing my Fowler’s (which I think excellently prescriptive) and also my Burchfield’s (less so, as more descriptive). So I’ll pass for the moment.

Is this degenerating into a general-purpose nightmare pedant thread?

Not yet, although I am expecting to see a smiley from Conky soon that illustrates his current level of frustration and disbelief

PS: I have fixed jdaw's broken BB code in this version

[Conky]

I'm finding it very satisfying. Keep it up. Remember he's OUR expert...

[jdaw1]

I'm finding it very satisfying. Keep it up. Remember he's OUR expert...

Conky, in a correctly apostrophised comment, described me as an “expert†. Well, I think it’s me that he is so describing. Great progress.

Perhaps next I should work on “…† rather than “...†.

[DRT]

I'm finding it very satisfying. Keep it up. Remember he's OUR expert...

Conky, in a correctly apostrophised comment, described me as an “expert†. Well, I think it’s me that he is so describing. Great progress.

Perhaps next I should work on “…† rather than “...†.

I don't think you should try that one. Persuading us to use apotrophes in the correct place does not present any additional difficulty to the technically challenged. Trying to teach the correct use of Unicode characters is a whole different ball-game

[KillerB]

I'm finding it very satisfying. Keep it up. Remember he's OUR expert...

Conky, in a correctly apostrophised comment, described me as an “expert†. Well, I think it’s me that he is so describing. Great progress.

Perhaps next I should work on “…† rather than “...†.

I don't think you should try that one. Persuading us to use apotrophes in the correct place does not present any additional difficulty to the technically challenged. Trying to teach the correct use of Unicode characters is a whole different ball-game

Especially for those of us using a Windows lap-top most of the time. Even if I could be bothered to find the right codes I'm pretty sure that I would not be bothered to attempt. Let's face it, it is easier to type "..." ... and yes, I am perfectly happy with my straight quotation marks... and the incorrect use of the ellipsis for connecting...

[DRT]

and yes, I am perfectly happy with my straight quotation marks... and the incorrect use of the ellipsis for connecting...

Does that mean I can continue to incorrectly use double straight quotation marks without fear of ridicule?

[KillerB]

and yes, I am perfectly happy with my straight quotation marks... and the incorrect use of the ellipsis for connecting...

Does that mean I can continue to incorrectly use double straight quotation marks without fear of ridicule?

If anybody ridicules you for them then we shall have a concerted ridicule in the opposite direction.

[DRT]

Good.

With that established I have no fear in now asking...

"When should I use these " " and when should I use these ' '?"

Please note that the question, and hopefully the resulting answer, ignores anything to do with straightness v curlyness.

Derek

[Alex Bridgeman]

I want to protest. The title of this thread is "apostrophe crimes". We have gone off topic as we are now discussing other grammatical errors.

Mr Admin(s) - please consider this a formal request to split the thread.


Alex





















Will anyone take me seriously as I sit here wondering what I've just achieved with the last five minutes of my life?

[Conky]

Keep it up.

This is becoming more and more like those Open University lectures they used to transmit on BBC2. The bloke with the beard wittering on next to a board full of formulas.

And Julian, I dont know how to say this, but a while back, when I moaned to someone, having been told about Cant and Dont for the umpteenth time, that when it came to Apostrophe's, you could be a pillock, the reply was, 'yes, but he's OUR pillock'

This made me smile, and put me in the mood for a bit more apostrophe correction.

I'm sure you're an expert as well, but to be fair, how would I know!

[DRT]

I want to protest. The title of this thread is "apostrophe crimes". We have gone off topic as we are now discussing other grammatical errors.

Mr Admin(s) - please consider this a formal request to split the thread.

As the notional 'owner" of this thread is an Admin, I suggest we leave it to him to decide whether or not the offtopicness has been sufficiently bad to warrant splitenation.

Derek

Will anyone take me seriously as I sit here wondering what I've just achieved with the last five minutes of my life?

No. You're just bored and sitting at an airport again, aren't you?

Derek

[KillerB]

"When should I use these " " and when should I use these ' '?"

'owner"

Preferably not together in the same quotation.

[jdaw1]

Does that mean I can continue to incorrectly use double straight quotation marks without fear of ridicule?

It seems so. And split infinitives.

[jdaw1]

As the notional 'owner" of this thread is an Admin, I suggest we leave it to him to decide whether or not the offtopicness has been sufficiently bad to warrant splitenation.

I’m not use that a thread is really “owned† by whoever who starts it—perhaps they are all “owned† by the team—but I don’t think the world would be a better place after a split. Unless there is a contrary consensus.

[Conky]

"When should I use these " " and when should I use these ' '?"Derek

Somewhat bizarrely, you have stumbled into my field. Firstly, they are quotation marks, forget this inverted comma crap.
The single quotation mark is old English. The Americans prefered the double. Each is acceptable.
It is often considered that by common usage, it should be that the double quotation mark is used for direct speech, whereas the single should be used for common quotes that everyone would probably know.

If your wondering, no one, in a certain profession, gives a toss about spelling, grammar or apostrophes, but evidentially, everyone pays attention to direct quotes, particularly on first contact.

[DRT]

"When should I use these " " and when should I use these ' '?"

'owner"

Preferably not together in the same quotation.

jdaw would have (and probably has) spotted this as an intentional error and not been drawn into reporting it here. Go to the bottom of the Pedant Class and try not to be sucked into Noel Edmunds style 'Gotcha" situations in future

Derek

PS: single to the left and double to the right is my new quotation style. Do you think it will catch on?

[jdaw1]

I’m still marvelling at something apostrophe-related being Conky’s field.

[Alex Bridgeman]

No. You're just bored and sitting at an airport again, aren't you?

Yes I bloody am. I was supposed to fly from Munich to Heathrow this afternoon, leaving Munich at 1515 and arriving Heathrow at 1630.

Now I will arrive at Birmingham at 22:35 and will have to stop my nose bleed in order to pick up a hire car, drive down the M40 back to Heathrow, return the hire car, get the hire car bus at 2am to take me to Terminal 1 so I can pick my car up from the car park and drive home.

I was supposed to get home around 5:30pm. Now I expect to get home around 3am. As you can tell, I'm not a happy bunny and Lufthansa don't look after me as well as BA would so (a) there's no port in the lounge and (b) even if there was I have to drive so I wouldn't be able to drink any anyway.

Grump!

Somebody post something meaningful or I'll resort to listing out some more corks...

Alex

[Conky]

Maybe you could go and post what P stood for on that cork???

[KillerB]

Crikey - had no idea why you were stuck. Just seen a very broken-looking 777 at Heathrow. Can't see that moving for a while.

[jdaw1]

A passenger plane has crash-landed short of a runway at Heathrow Airport, ripping off part of its undercarriage.

All 136 passengers and 16 crew escaped from the British Airways flight BA038 from Beijing. Thirteen people have been taken to hospital with minor injuries.

An airport worker told the BBC the pilot on the Boeing 777 had said he had lost all power, and had been forced to glide the plane in to land.

All BA short-haul flights from Heathrow have been cancelled and others delayed.

The worker also said the pilot had told him all the electronics had also failed.

"He said he had no warning - it just went," the worker added.

"It's a miracle. The man deserves a medal as big as a frying pan."

BA refused to comment on the report and said it would not speculate on the cause of the crash.

Police say the incident was not terror-related.

Nearby Hillingdon Hospital is treating 13 casualties, nine men and four women. Four of those admitted are BA crew members, but the pilot is not thought to be among them.

Director of operations Jacqueline Totterdell said most would be discharged later on Thursday, but one woman would be admitted overnight. She said some were suffering from whiplash.

Seven of those in hospital are British and three are Chinese. The nationalities of the others are not yet known.

BA said one of those injured had a broken leg.

The incident happened on the south runway at 1242 GMT, as Prime Minister Gordon Brown was due to leave Heathrow for China and India. His flight was delayed because of the incident.

Witnesses described the plane coming in very low and landing short of the runway, before skidding across grass and tarmac.

Part of the undercarriage, including two wheels were torn off, and there was some damage to the wings.

The runway was initially closed, but reopened later to take-offs only. The north runway remained open throughout the incident.

A telephone helpline has been set up for anyone concerned about friends or relatives on 0800 3894193.

The Department of Transport's Air Accidents Investigation Branch has launched an investigation.

In a statement, it said initial findings would be released within 48 hours, followed by a more detailed, but still preliminary, report within 30 days.

Paul Venter, who was on board the plane, said he had been aware of a problem just as the plane was about to land.

"I could hear the undercarriage come out, and the next moment the plane just dropped," Mr Venter said.

"When everything came to a standstill, I looked out of the window and the undercarriage was gone and the plane was on its belly."

Eyewitness John Rowland, who was driving on the nearby M4 motorway, said: "The plane's wheels collapsed, doors were flown open.

"On its approach it took the runway too low, just missing the roof of my cab.

Do I approve of the use of the more formal word “Airliner† rather than “Aeroplane† or even “Airplane†? Hmmm.

[Alex Bridgeman]

Yup. That's why I've been sitting in Munich airport for the last 5 hours. While very grateful not to have been on the flight causing all the chaos, I do despair at the policy of BAA to run Heathrow at well over its maximum resiliant rate. As soon as something goes wrong, BA cancel all their short-haul flights as the BAA contingency plan. It really pisses me off. I wish instead they would simply say "Heathrow's closed, tough. We're taking you to Gatwick / Luton / Bournemouth / etc." 'cos then I could hire a car and get home in an hour.

What's even more galling, is that half the Lufthansa flights are still flying in to Heathrow.

Still, Conky's reminded me about my meaningless question so I'll post something on that thread.

Alex

[Alex Bridgeman]

Yay! We're boarding! This is going to require a very good bottle over the weekend to make up for what's happened.

[DRT]

Question: How do you cheer up a friend who is stuck in an airport waiting to take off?

Answer: Tell him a story about a crash landing

Well done jdaw

[jdaw1]

Perhaps we need an interesting theme to attract others. Here are some suggestions:

1. Bring a bottle of port wrapped in silver foil
2. Single's Night (only SQVP's allowed)
3. 1960 Horizontal
4. 1980 Horizontal
5. The G-Plan (Graham's Vertical)
6. Rose Night

(If it isn’t an error, there won’t be much drinking.)

[Overtired and emotional]

Airliner implies intercontinental travel; a cruise ship, travelling one continent, may be a liner, but is a liner a cruise ship?

My preference is for aeroplane (just on aesthetic rather than etymological grounds).

Does anyone fancy abolishing air travel and returning to the seas for any travel whcih cannot be accomplished by railway?

[KillerB]

Does anyone fancy abolishing air travel and returning to the seas for any travel whcih cannot be accomplished by railway?

Sounds nice but I have to teach next week in Reading and Glasgow, the following week in Kentucky and the week after in New York and still be home in time for Easter.

[jdaw1]

I have recently been slacking, allowing criminals to think they can get away with it.

But they cant sell them via export and make a profit.

[jdaw1]

Do Monks apply the same rule to celibacy or Nun's to silence?

[jdaw1]

Let me know when your going Derek, and if its after one of my pay days,

[jdaw1]

I've been looking for a previous reference, but cant find one.

[DRT]

Another brain-out from Wiseboy. Not a good week for the resident pedant.

:insert smug emoticon here:

[KillerB]

Another brain-out from Wiseboy. Not a good week for the resident pedant.

:insert smug emoticon here:

No, it is this that is the problem:

The wife’s has the casting vote, and she favours the RP85.

[jdaw1]

I think Derek T., was lightly hinting at my crime, providing a pointer but not daring to speak its name.

{Sackcloth and ashes emoticon}

[DRT]

I think Derek T., was lightly hinting at my crime, providing a pointer but not daring to speak its name.

{Sackcloth and ashes emoticon}

Correct. You should never kick a man when he's down. Shame on you, KillerB

Derek

[KillerB]

I think Derek T., was lightly hinting at my crime, providing a pointer but not daring to speak its name.

{Sackcloth and ashes emoticon}

Correct. You should never kick a man when he's down. Shame on you, KillerB

Derek

Who needs subtlety at a time like this?

[DRT]

I think Derek T., was lightly hinting at my crime, providing a pointer but not daring to speak its name.

{Sackcloth and ashes emoticon}

Correct. You should never kick a man when he's down. Shame on you, KillerB

Derek

Who needs subtlety at a time like this?

You're right, what was I thinking. Kick him, kick him like you would kick a rabid dog attacking your goat.

Derek

[jdaw1]

Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! Stop it!

[jdaw1]

Last one's I remember were:

[jdaw1]

esp ones whose birthday's have passed recently!

For some reason—which surely can’t be mercy—I have been overlooking g-man’s apostrophe crimes.

[g-man]

esp ones whose birthday's have passed recently!

For some reason—which surely can’t be mercy—I have been overlooking g-man’s apostrophe crimes.

'hat would be the proper apostrophe in this scenario pray tell.

[jdaw1]

esp ones whose birthday's have passed recently!

For some reason—which surely can’t be mercy—I have been overlooking g-man’s apostrophe crimes.

'hat would be the proper apostrophe in this scenario pray tell.

The “whose† is fine. Look at the following word.

[jdaw1]

Sadly, none was decanted into a small bottle for further examination due to the fact that by the end of the evening, all contents of the original bottle had been decanted into the five attendees glasses!

The sadness is indeed excessive.