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I see Cook is leading from the front again - another sub-20 score.

That said, they shouldn't need him this time.

DRT wrote:I see Cook is leading from the front again - another sub-20 score.

That said, they shouldn't need him this time.

So, how's the cricket going today?

I saw on a Cricinfo slot today Bell being propounded as the next captain. And he did give the post match interview.

But life would not play such a rotten trick on me...

What news from the old country? The score I see on the interweb is a joke, yes?

djewesbury wrote:What news from the old country?

Not the best to be honest. Mathews deserved the win.

But we have a new bearded wonder to replace the long mourned Bill Frindall.

So Owen, what did you think of today's result?
Well Owen I can't help thinking that it would be better to discuss this when there is someone to discuss it with.
You might say that Owen but I think that there are positives to be taken from these games, it's just that none of them are about the England side.
Really? Do go on.
What I could say about England was that the bowling looked poor, the fielding was shoddy, most of the batting was awful, the captaincy was a combination of dire and outré and the response to the loss, with one notable exception, showed complacency and no grasp of how terrible the team looked. The notable exception was Anderson, who cried, as indeed they all should have.
OK, thanks for your input.

Looking forward to India.

I think you are being a little unfair, there needs to be some time for a rebuild. Ali looked terrific, Root scored a double hundred. Even Ballance scored some runs. Broad took his second hat-trick in tests, a first in the history of the game and Plunkett looked the part at times. And Anderson never gets lucky at Headingly.

I think you're right

You idiot, you know absolutely nothing.

Nice start to the India series. I have found a way to listen to TMS outside the UK. I look forward to my visit to Day 4 at Lord's next week! (Lord's, not the Lords, white seats, not red benches.)

djewesbury wrote: (Lord's, not the Lords, white seats, not red benches.)

Don't start all that again. I find myself in the unusual position of having no opinion about today's play.

LGTrotter wrote:

djewesbury wrote: (Lord's, not the Lords, white seats, not red benches.)

Don't start all that again. I find myself in the unusual position of having no opinion about today's play.

Could someone turn Owen off and turn him on again?

djewesbury wrote:

LGTrotter wrote:

djewesbury wrote: (Lord's, not the Lords, white seats, not red benches.)

Don't start all that again. I find myself in the unusual position of having no opinion about today's play.

Could someone turn Owen off and turn him on again?

I'm not volunteering for that. Oo-er Missus!

Just remembered Strauss' (no idea where ' goes) valedictory remark as Pietersen left the field the other day. Can't help liking Strauss a little bit more.

342-5 at lunch on day 2. India appear quite comfortable at the crease.

500+ looks likely.

DRT wrote:342-5 at lunch on day 2. India appear quite comfortable at the crease.

500+ looks likely.

Perhaps not. Now 346-8

DRT wrote:

DRT wrote:342-5 at lunch on day 2. India appear quite comfortable at the crease.

500+ looks likely.

Perhaps not. Now 346-8

Make that 346-9

The England bowlers clearly had three shredded wheat for lunch.

DRT wrote:342-5 at lunch on day 2. India appear quite comfortable at the crease.

500+ looks likely.

The mockers gods can never resist a challenge.

DRT wrote:

DRT wrote:

DRT wrote:342-5 at lunch on day 2. India appear quite comfortable at the crease.

500+ looks likely.

Perhaps not. Now 346-8

Make that 346-9

The England bowlers clearly had three shredded wheat for lunch.

Derek wrong in a prediction? Good Lord no!!!

djewesbury wrote:

DRT wrote:

DRT wrote:

DRT wrote:342-5 at lunch on day 2. India appear quite comfortable at the crease.

500+ looks likely.

Perhaps not. Now 346-8

Make that 346-9

The England bowlers clearly had three shredded wheat for lunch.

Derek wrong in a prediction? Good Lord no!!!

Perhaps not. Now 419-9. The tail enders are digging in and hitting boundaries almost at will. Now the highest 10th wicket partnership in Indian test history against England. Shami's test average before today was 3 runs. Now on 32. Quite impressive to watch.

DRT wrote:

djewesbury wrote:

DRT wrote:

DRT wrote:

DRT wrote:342-5 at lunch on day 2. India appear quite comfortable at the crease.

500+ looks likely.

Perhaps not. Now 346-8

Make that 346-9

The England bowlers clearly had three shredded wheat for lunch.

Derek wrong in a prediction? Good Lord no!!!

Perhaps not. Now 419-9. The tail enders are digging in and hitting boundaries almost at will. Now the highest 10th wicket partnership in Indian test history against England. Shami's test average before today was 3 runs. Now on 32. Quite impressive to watch.

Oh you Cassandra.

DRT wrote:

djewesbury wrote:

DRT wrote:

DRT wrote:

DRT wrote:342-5 at lunch on day 2. India appear quite comfortable at the crease.

500+ looks likely.

Perhaps not. Now 346-8

Make that 346-9

The England bowlers clearly had three shredded wheat for lunch.

Derek wrong in a prediction? Good Lord no!!!

Perhaps not. Now 419-9. The tail enders are digging in and hitting boundaries almost at will. Now the highest 10th wicket partnership in Indian test history against England. Shami's test average before today was 3 runs. Now on 32. Quite impressive to watch.

Oh you Cassandra.

I say chaps, isn't that little Bellie batting? Enough scope and time left for him to score a double century, secure his place in the team for the rest of the summer and be awarded the captaincy when Cook is sent back to the County circuit to recover his form.

AHB wrote:I say chaps, isn't that little Bellie batting? Enough scope and time left for him to score a double century, secure his place in the team for the rest of the summer and be awarded the captaincy when Cook is sent back to the County circuit to recover his form.

The man's an idiot! What was he thinking of? My gran could have done better with a stick of rhubarb!

AHB wrote:I say chaps, isn't that little Bellie batting? Enough scope and time left for him to score a double century, secure his place in the team for the rest of the summer and be awarded the captaincy when Cook is sent back to the County circuit to recover his form.

Captaincy is the last thing Bell needs! I fear that the England team are in for a prolonged period of difficulty, because there are two issues with no short or medium term solution. First, there is no serious option for an alternative to Cook as captain, and therefore Cook will struggle to find form with the bat. second, there is no front line spinner.

flash_uk wrote:

AHB wrote:I say chaps, isn't that little Bellie batting? Enough scope and time left for him to score a double century, secure his place in the team for the rest of the summer and be awarded the captaincy when Cook is sent back to the County circuit to recover his form.

Captaincy is the last thing Bell needs! I fear that the England team are in for a prolonged period of difficulty, because there are two issues with no short or medium term solution. First, there is no serious option for an alternative to Cook as captain, and therefore Cook will struggle to find form with the bat. second, there is no front line spinner.

We spent many years without a real effective front-line spinner. Swanny didn't rejoin the England team until comparatively recently and Monty was hardly deadly before that. Of course a spinner would be really great, but we can win without one, providing the groundsmen can prepare proper pitches!

AHB wrote:I say chaps, isn't that little Bellie batting? Enough scope and time left for him to score a double century, secure his place in the team for the rest of the summer and be awarded the captaincy when Cook is sent back to the County circuit to recover his form.

If I didn't know better I would have said that this was a little juicy dangler that Alex has left us with. How did Bell get on BTW...

Spinners; there aren't any. Not for the next few years.
Captains; well there's Cook... again I can't think of an alternative.
Batsmen; England looks like a team that is dying to collapse. Can't think when they last posted a really big score.

Regarding the pitch comment from Daniel; Very true and I understand that the groundsman has fessed up, 'I got it wrong' being the essence of the statement. I like it when people do this.

Not many countries have really good spinners now. Really. And as for the captaincy, I would predict that after this summer and half the next winter someone will be lined up; like it or not that will probably be Ian Bell. Or what about Jimmy? Or Broady? These are the only senior members of the team, barring Prior. Ok, seriously, it will be Bell. But perhaps Root is the next captain but one...

I think Broad is deserving of some praise. I think he has often been the shinning light amongst the pile of poo that is the rest of the team.

No alternative to Cook? What about giving up completely?

He has also often been the one unable to contain his temper.

djewesbury wrote:He has also often been the one unable to contain his temper.

Partly understandable given performance of his team mates, but a flaw indeed.

I feel a bit daft saying this (given the current circs) but I would be very surprised if Cook does not remain captain for the foreseeable future. There is a slimmish (but getting fatter) chance he will resign and play in the counties to get some runs, even then I would guess he will be back. My judgements on Bell may disqualify me from seeing this objectively but I think a view has been reached that Bell ain't captain material. I doubt Anderson would want or be offered it, he is entering the twilight. Which leaves Broad. An outside shout might be Root.

LGTrotter wrote:

AHB wrote:I say chaps, isn't that little Bellie batting? Enough scope and time left for him to score a double century, secure his place in the team for the rest of the summer and be awarded the captaincy when Cook is sent back to the County circuit to recover his form.

If I didn't know better I would have said that this was a little juicy dangler that Alex has left us with. How did Bell get on BTW...

Where is Alex, leaving his juicy danglers dangling, is there a solution to the myriad issues discussed here from the man himself. I am agog, or Magog, I'm not sure which.

LGTrotter wrote:

LGTrotter wrote:

AHB wrote:I say chaps, isn't that little Bellie batting? Enough scope and time left for him to score a double century, secure his place in the team for the rest of the summer and be awarded the captaincy when Cook is sent back to the County circuit to recover his form.

If I didn't know better I would have said that this was a little juicy dangler that Alex has left us with. How did Bell get on BTW...

Where is Alex, leaving his juicy danglers dangling, is there a solution to the myriad issues discussed here from the man himself. I am agog, or Magog, I'm not sure which.

Never mind, you're a man who knows the proper usage of 'myriad', and for that you get 100 points. Your kind are few.

djewesbury wrote:Never mind, you're a man who knows the proper usage of 'myriad', and for that you get 100 points. Your kind are few.

I am awaiting the comedic rejoinder 'psych' as I accept the plaudit.

This is so unexpected, I should like to thank my family, my agent and of course my stylist. I hope that all the young people on this fine forum take hope from this story.

LGTrotter wrote:

djewesbury wrote:Never mind, you're a man who knows the proper usage of 'myriad', and for that you get 100 points. Your kind are few.

I am awaiting the comedic rejoinder 'psych' as I accept the plaudit.

This is so unexpected, I should like to thank my family, my agent and of course my stylist. I hope that all the young people on this fine forum take hope from this story.

"Kirsty, a very moving speech there from Owen, don't you think?"
"Yes, he really set the tone for the night, and his humility is such a change from some of the other nominees and winners. A real inspiration."

And you're right that we haven't had a decent spinner in years, apart from Swann. And I find it hard to credit his story that he woke up one morning on the ashes tour and couldn't spin the ball anymore.

djewesbury wrote:He has also often been the one unable to contain his temper.

At least he has never bitten any of the opposition

LGTrotter wrote:And you're right that we haven't had a decent spinner in years, apart from Swann. And I find it hard to credit his story that he woke up one morning on the ashes tour and couldn't spin the ball anymore.

No. He just woke up one morning and thought "I really don't want to be a part of these fecking useless losers any more."

Do I get 1000 points for the correct use of fecking?

Lest we forget Julian's injunction not to gloat.

LGTrotter wrote:

LGTrotter wrote:

AHB wrote:I say chaps, isn't that little Bellie batting? Enough scope and time left for him to score a double century, secure his place in the team for the rest of the summer and be awarded the captaincy when Cook is sent back to the County circuit to recover his form.

If I didn't know better I would have said that this was a little juicy dangler that Alex has left us with. How did Bell get on BTW...

Where is Alex, leaving his juicy danglers dangling, is there a solution to the myriad issues discussed here from the man himself. I am agog, or Magog, I'm not sure which.

Oh dear. Have I left you hanging? Sorry about that. I've just returned home from something of a vinous extravaganza. I shall post pictures tomorrow (or later) but suffice it to say that there was a multiplicity of wondrous wines. You will see why I was distracted in due course.

That you have been to a vinous extravaganza is scarcely news. I look forward to all the gossip.

And Jimmy gets to a new career best with an upper cut over the slips for 4!
Oh and Root got his hundred.
Highest last-wicket partnership from both sides, in games against one another.

50 for Jimmy..?

Going along nicely. Why didn't the top order do this. Jimmy for number 3!

LGTrotter wrote:Going along nicely. Why didn't the top order do this. Jimmy for number 3!

Presumably the fact that the quicks can't get out the tail tells us how rubbish the pitch is.

djewesbury wrote:50 for Jimmy..?

Yes, and with a pull shot!

A very spirited display - good to see.

DRT wrote:A very spirited display - good to see.

Huzzah, indeed. Well done Cook, Bell and Prior for laying a firm foundation. Poor old Jimmy, he's got to bowl in a bit...

Will this never end?