Apostrophe crimes
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
*sigh*
I sometimes think Glenn must have a secret room - a shed? an outhouse on his roof? - where he goes to use Apple products. It's a guilty secret but he sits and gazes at the interface and thinks, if it feels this right, how can it be wrong?
And always be careful of believing one of Alex's excuses. Currently if I try and type 'creme' Apple suggests 'cerne', presumably expecting that I'm taking part in a discussion about the Cerne Abbas Giant.
I sometimes think Glenn must have a secret room - a shed? an outhouse on his roof? - where he goes to use Apple products. It's a guilty secret but he sits and gazes at the interface and thinks, if it feels this right, how can it be wrong?
And always be careful of believing one of Alex's excuses. Currently if I try and type 'creme' Apple suggests 'cerne', presumably expecting that I'm taking part in a discussion about the Cerne Abbas Giant.
Daniel J.
Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Indeed.djewesbury wrote:*sigh*
I sometimes think Glenn must have a secret room - a shed? an outhouse on his roof? - where he goes to use Apple products.
My son Ross is currently forging a career in retail management. To date he has worked for Argos, Asda (Walmart), Krispy Creme and Sports Direct. By strange coincidence every one of those companies was the best company ever in the history of companies whilst he was working for them and all of their competitors were rubbish.
Methinks Glenn and Ross share a common trait

"The first duty of Port is to be red"
Ernest H. Cockburn
Ernest H. Cockburn
Re: Apostrophe crimes
I mock Apple not for the quality if their products, which us actually superb, but for their carefully cultivated hipster vibe, undeserved superiority complex, and positively Pavlovian reactions of their fanbois.
Glenn Elliott
Re: Apostrophe crimes
Also, autoincorrect attempts to learn your common mistakes so that it can make adjustments that are most likely to be correct for you. Thus comparing suggestions made for different people is pointless other than for the potential humor.
Glenn Elliott
Re: Apostrophe crimes
Note that my autoincorrect can't seem to figure out is/us and if/of, probably because 2 letters just isn't enough to go on.
Glenn Elliott
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
In my case, I've been using Apple computers since 1992. I think before this all I'd used were the ZXSpectrum we had at home and the BBC computers we had at school. So I had no chance really.
Daniel J.
Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
I have owned an Apple Mac since 1988. And the best Apple OS was Snow Leopard, being four versions ago (Lion, Mountain Lion, Yosemite, Mavericks). Since when downhill in usability and stability.Glenn E. wrote:I mock Apple not for the quality if their products, which us actually superb, but for their carefully cultivated hipster vibe, undeserved superiority complex, and positively Pavlovian reactions of their fanbois.
Re: Apostrophe crimes
I used an Apple IIe in high school, Unix mainframes in college, IBM mainframes and DOS PCs during my early career, Macs when I switched to a career in games at Wizards of the Coast, then back to PCs (now Windows) since.
I can make all kinds of generalizations about each, but ultimately they're all just computers. Garbage in, garbage out. PEBKAC.
I can make all kinds of generalizations about each, but ultimately they're all just computers. Garbage in, garbage out. PEBKAC.
Glenn Elliott
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Now, I know I'm not the one here who's good at doing counting…
jdaw1 wrote:Just four of us, CPR, THRA and JDAW, met in the Green Room of The Boot & Flogger for a tasting with the theme ‘Blind with a clue’.
Daniel J.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Thank you: corrected. (I removed DRT from the list, but hadn’t yet noticed the failure to correct the number.)
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
I beat the number man!
Daniel J.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
My pathetic whingeing excuse is that I was busy creating and inter-linking TN threads, and had not yet had a chance to check my work.
Yes, I know, a pathetic whingeing excuse.
Yes, I know, a pathetic whingeing excuse.
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
The court is minded to show clemency given the previous good character of the defendant. But what a mistake to make.
Daniel J.
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- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
I gave this offender (a man, it should be noted, of well-known dubious character, as I've often noted in the past; see above) the chance to correct his work in-thread. He chose to ignore that and so I present the court with his multiply-slapdash notes. He has let the forum down, he has let each of us down, but most of all…
jdaw1 wrote:2011 Niepoort Crusted, which CPR said came from the ’07 and ’08 harvests. Dark dark red-purple, 100% opaque. Very young and big-fruited. The great early- and late-palate, A lightness mid-palate made we wonder about crusted. Having spoken about crusted from a few minutes, the clue — “Intrigued by Alex’s tasting note of it” — made me recall the Old Vines Six Grapes. Mid-led by the clue: I should have stuck with Crusted.
Daniel J.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
My sub-standard work has been improved. Thank you for the (repeat) insistence on more careful handiwork.
Re: Apostrophe crimes
I was recently reminded of the existence of this FTLoP thread on the subject of apostrophe in Port names.
Derek T. wrote:I always use an apostrophy except when I dont - Alex's description of the reactions of the apostrophites and the antiapostrophites is spot on, and makes me laugh
Re: Apostrophe crimes
I cannot resist. After an American politician mixed up 'your' and 'you're', I was reminded of the following:
http://www.tickld.com/pic/t/381012
Please forgive the slight crudeness.....
http://www.tickld.com/pic/t/381012
Please forgive the slight crudeness.....
Re: Apostrophe crimes
Would the noun, in British English, be ‘doctrinocity’? This is a question. Compare, for example, this post written 17 minutes later:[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=92948#p92948]Here[/url] LGTrotter wrote:but esisted the urge to avoid any taint of doctrinosity.
Re: Apostrophe crimes
[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=93036#p93036]Here[/url] DRT wrote:More accurately, it will be taking thousands of pictures of Pluto and it's moons during the closest parts of the flyby
Re: Apostrophe crimes
{sackcloth-and-ashes}
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
Ernest H. Cockburn
Ernest H. Cockburn
Re: Apostrophe crimes
So for the people nominated by the public, they will “only consider” them, but for people not nominated by the public, the Committee and the Governor might both nominate and consider them.The Bank of England, in a press release entitled [url=http://www.bankofengland.co.uk/publications/Pages/news/2015/058.aspx]News Release - £20 banknote character selection and future banknote design[/url], wrote:Both the Committee and the Governor will make their decisions with reference to the character selection principles announced in December 2013 and will only consider people nominated by the public.
Re: Apostrophe crimes
Is ‘double-magnum’ a compound noun, so hyphenated, or should it be an adjective and a noun, so non-hyphenatedly ‘double magnum’?
Compare:
• We drank three double-magnums.
• We drank three double magnums.
I prefer the hyphen, but am willing to concede to a contrary consensus.
Compare:
• We drank three double-magnums.
• We drank three double magnums.
I prefer the hyphen, but am willing to concede to a contrary consensus.
Re: Apostrophe crimes
I guess if you drink three DMGs, you will not really care for the spelling anymore.jdaw1 wrote:Is ‘double-magnum’ a compound noun, so hyphenated, or should it be an adjective and a noun, so non-hyphenatedly ‘double magnum’?
Compare:
• We drank three double-magnums.
• We drank three double magnums.
I prefer the hyphen, but am willing to concede to a contrary consensus.

All joking aside, I would prefer the hyphen, too (though I'm not a native speaker).
The Eleventh Commandment: Thou shalt know thy Port
Re: Apostrophe crimes
That would depend on how many are “we”, and who they are.AW77 wrote:I guess if you drink three DMGs, you will not really care for the spelling anymore.
Separately, the use of “DMGs” is painful. Why is the ‘G’ capitalised? Indeed, why is it there at all?
Re: Apostrophe crimes
I think this acronym is here to increase the already high number of abbreviations in the wine world. We wouldn't want to let everyone know so easily what we are talking about, would we?jdaw1 wrote:AW77 wrote:Separately, the use of “DMGs” is painful. Why is the ‘G’ capitalised? Indeed, why is it there at all?

The Eleventh Commandment: Thou shalt know thy Port
Re: Apostrophe crimes
Whenever you find yourself thinking of using “DMG”, instead write “½Imp”.
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Gothenburg. The pub at my hotel. Not their first language, you plead in mitigation. But somehow, for some reason, this seems more wrong as a result. (Perhaps, on reflection, I should be trying harder to ingratiate myself?)

Daniel J.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Nah, let'em have it i say! Both barrels. It being a franchise (or summit) with multiple outlets makes it more of a crime.
They do serve ok beer but obviously this pales in comparison with the signage problem.
They do serve ok beer but obviously this pales in comparison with the signage problem.
Re: Apostrophe crimes
No. Serving good beer is more important.PopulusTremula wrote:They do serve ok beer but obviously this pales in comparison with the signage problem.
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
WHAT??? Something is more important than bad grammar in signs??jdaw1 wrote:No. Serving good beer is more important.PopulusTremula wrote:They do serve ok beer but obviously this pales in comparison with the signage problem.

Daniel J.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes

“Items Prohibited In The Aircraft Cabin … Sharp Objects … Blunt Objects …”. Oh. So, everything.
- djewesbury
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Apostrophe crimes
jdaw1 wrote:Side question for Daniel: what affect will this thread have on the 1975 horizontal?
Shame on both of you.DRT wrote:'m hoping it doesn't become the route for the Gentleman's Triathlon
Daniel J.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Please sir, a young student seeks education. What is my sin†?
† This is a family-friendly forum — make full use of the context in which the question is asked.
† This is a family-friendly forum — make full use of the context in which the question is asked.
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Did you mean to use the word 'affect'?
Daniel J.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
As in, changing something, perhaps slightly? Yes.djewesbury wrote:Did you mean to use the word 'affect'?
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
No. You used a noun: affect. This is a word used by psychologists and refers to emotional states. Please reconsider.
Daniel J.
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- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
And please learn the different usages of the noun and verb forms of 'affect' and 'effect'.
Daniel J.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
I was unaware that the noun was so different to the verb. Thank you—your reprimand will affect my usage of the word.djewesbury wrote:And please learn the different usages of the noun and verb forms of 'affect' and 'effect'.
Re: Apostrophe crimes
Is this a singular/plural thing?djewesbury wrote:DRT wrote:'m hoping it doesn't become the route for the Gentleman's Triathlon
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
Ernest H. Cockburn
Ernest H. Cockburn
Re: Apostrophe crimes
I might have written “Gentlemen’s Triathlon”, but I might have written much as you did. Doubtless teacher will explain.
- djewesbury
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Apostrophe crimes
"Gentleman's Triathlon" is clearly a solecism when events are commonly described as "Women's Ashes" or "Men's 100 metres".
Please don't compound this with Jesuitical, self-serving, hair-splitting arguments. You are both admins and meant to be showing an example around here. Let that be the end of it.
Please don't compound this with Jesuitical, self-serving, hair-splitting arguments. You are both admins and meant to be showing an example around here. Let that be the end of it.
Daniel J.
Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
An athlete might indeed take such a dim view of the idea. That need not concern us three.djewesbury wrote:"Gentleman's Triathlon" is clearly a solecism
Was this sentence proof-read?djewesbury wrote:"Gentleman's Triathlon" is clearly a solecism when events are commonly described as "Women's Ashes" or "Men's 100 metres".
Self-serving ignorance: this is exactly the place for hair-splitting arguments.djewesbury wrote:Please don't compound this with Jesuitical, self-serving, hair-splitting arguments.
The example we are setting is the willingness to learn.djewesbury wrote:You are both admins and meant to be showing an example around here.
Hallelujah. (Is that Jesuitical?)djewesbury wrote:Let that be the end of it.
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Good. Then I'm right, and all this shilly-shallying in your self-justifying quote-a-thon is merely time-wasting.
Daniel J.
Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
And no, Hallelujah is not Jesuitical. Minus 100 points. And you have to submit a report on the religious exegesis in A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by the start of the new term.
Daniel J.
Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Thought not. Far too loud. I realise that this is naughtily relying on secondary sources which might be obsolete, but my vision of the Jesuits is entirely Zurbaránesque.djewesbury wrote:Hallelujah is not Jesuitical.
Ooh, it is becoming difficult to double my score.djewesbury wrote:Minus 100 points.
A century ago Dublin was steeped in Catholic guilt; in this era Ireland votes for gay marriage. A century ago Beirut and Damascus were playgrounds of the rich and decadent; in this era they have retreated to anti-superstitious superstition. London and only London is unchangingly quiet in its just restraint, the stalwart inhabitants of which drink thirty- to fifty-year-old Port in moderation. That is, in moderately large quantities. This is what matters.djewesbury wrote:And you have to submit a report on the religious exegesis in A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by the start of the new term.
Re: Apostrophe crimes
DRT wrote:Is this a singular/plural thing?djewesbury wrote:DRT wrote:'m hoping it doesn't become the route for the Gentleman's Triathlon
Had Sir not been so determined to show off a simple "Yes" would have sufficed. One hopes Sir does not spend his days displaying such ungentlemanly behaviour to the students of the six counties?djewesbury wrote:"Gentleman's Triathlon" is clearly a solecism when events are commonly described as "Women's Ashes" or "Men's 100 metres".
Please don't compound this with Jesuitical, self-serving, hair-splitting arguments. You are both admins and meant to be showing an example around here. Let that be the end of it.
Can't say I've ever met a Jesuit.
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
Ernest H. Cockburn
Ernest H. Cockburn
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
Do you think Jesuits declare themselves openly and go about amongst us like ordinary men? The day you discover that you've met a Jesuit is the day you know your minutes are numbered.
Daniel J.
Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
djewesbury wrote:Do you think Jesuits declare themselves openly and go about amongst us like ordinary men? The day you discover that you've met a Jesuit is the day you know your minutes are numbered.
Douglas Adams wrote:The Galaxy is littered with ex-Pralite monks, all on the make, because the mental control techniques the Order have evolved as a form of devotional discipline are, frankly, sensational — and extra-ordinary numbers of monks leave the Order just after they have finished their devotional training and just before they take their final vows to stay locked in small metal boxes for the rest of their lives.
- djewesbury
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Re: Apostrophe crimes
The wonderful, updated version of Tapatalk says that I wrote the second quote there. But I must disclaim that credit and give it to its rightful recipient, the great Douglas Adams.
Daniel J.
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Husband of a relentless former Soviet Chess Master.
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