The Off-topic Thread

[DRT]

Post anything you want to in this thread so long as it doe not relate to anything else in this thread.

My 1st contribution: Tonight I have killed my latest bottle of Morgan 1991 for no other reason than it was there.

[jdaw1]

It is claimed that there are no Barker codes longer than 13. I have written a program in C that is looking for such codes, a program that is running on a fast two-core computer. Output so far: evens; odds.

[jdaw1]

Twelve members of a democracy wish to elect a leader from amongst six candidates called A, B, C, D, E & F. The voters’ preferences are:

Code: Select all

4 people prefer  A to D to E to F to B to C;
3 people prefer  B to F to E to D to C to A;
2 people prefer  C to F to D to B to A to E;
1 person prefers D to C to E to B to A to F;
2 people prefer  F to D to E to C to B to A.

Who should be elected?

• A? British-style first past the post elects A.
• B? If, French style, there is a run off between those two candidates with the most first place votes, then B defeats A on the second round 8:4.
• C? Single Transferable Vote gives the victory to C. First E is eliminated, having no first-place preferences. Then D, that vote going to C, then F, leaving A:B:C with votes split 4:3:5, thus eliminating B; C winning the final round 8:4.
• D? If we assign 6 points to each first place vote, 5 to each second, etc, thus giving each candidate a Borda count, D would win, the candidates scoring 35:39:33:53:42:50.
• E? Approval voting allows voters to choose multiple approved candidates. For these purposes let’s say that voters would approve of their top three choices, and not approve the last three. E wins, the candidates approval vote totals being 4:3:3:9:10:7.
• F? Consider a head-to-head between each pair of candidates. F would beat A 7:5, F would beat B by 8:4, F beats C by 9:3, F beats D by 7:5, and F beats E 7:5. F is called the Condorcet winner. (Often voting is so muddled that there is no Condorcet winner.)

Of course, this could be still more confusing. Instead imagine that twelve members of a democracy wish to choose an electoral system from amongst six possibilities called A, B, C, D, E & F!

(This taken from Non-Intuitive Features of Electoral Systems.)

[jdaw1]

The Correct Construction of the Union Jack



The flag is twice as wide as it is high. The cross of St George is red, and has width equal to one fifth the flag’s height, and a white border of width one fifteenth the height.

The cross of St Andrew is interchanged with that of St Patrick. Start by drawing the diagonals of the whole flag, and then the lines parallel to these that are at a distance of one tenth and one fifteenth the height of the flag. (For clarity the diagram also shows the lines that are apart from the diagonals by only one thirtieth the height.) On the flag-pole side fill red the diagonally orientated area of width one fifteenth the height that lies below the diagonals, and on the non-flag-pole side, the diagonally orientated area of width one fifteenth the height that lies above the diagonals. Finally, fill blue everywhere that is both more than one tenth the height away from the diagonals, and more than one fifteenth the height away from the red of the cross of St George.

The blue should be Pantone 280, approximated here with an RGB setting of 0:0:102, and the red should be Pantone 186, approximated here with 204:0:0.

(Taken from How to draw the Union Jack accurately. And note the correct use of transparency in the image.)

[jdaw1]

Sin[3°] = Sqrt[ 8 ”“ Sqrt[10”“2 Sqrt[5]] ”“ Sqrt[3] (1+Sqrt[5]) ] / 4

(From Sin and Cos in Surds.)

[jdaw1]

The artist known as El Greco (the Greek) was born in Crete in 1541 as Doménicos Theotocópoulos (Δομήνικος Θεοτοκόπουλος). He studied in Venice, and in 1570 moved to Rome, and from there to Toledo in 1577 where he stayed until his death in 1614. Wikipedia says of El Greco that his dramatic and expressionistic style was met with puzzlement by his contemporaries but found appreciation in the 20th century. There is a distinctive feature of many of the faces painted by El Greco, documented at www.jdawiseman.com/papers/el-greco/el-g ... ology.html: those faces may well be modelled on a child with some specific malformation. But which?

Paediatricians and dysmorphology experts of the world: please help!

[Andy Velebil]

I saw a dead guy the other day, then another one the day after. Works been busy lately

[Alex Bridgeman]

We had our first daffodil flower in the garden today.

[benread]

I am off to Glasgow tomorrow. A curry is on the agenda.

[jdaw1]

After washing in hot water, some of my decanters dry very quickly. Others, in particular the one holding the Warre Quinta da Cavadinha 1986 currently being consumed, seem to acquire a ‘mist’ that takes many days to dry.

[Andy Velebil]

After washing in hot water, some of my decanters dry very quickly. Others, in particular the one holding the Warre Quinta da Cavadinha 1986 currently being consumed, seem to acquire a ‘mist’ that takes many days to dry.

I have one decanter that does the same thing, the rest don't...wierd!

[DRT]

After washing in hot water, some of my decanters dry very quickly. Others, in particular the one holding the Warre Quinta da Cavadinha 1986 currently being consumed, seem to acquire a ‘mist’ that takes many days to dry.

I have one decanter that does the same thing, the rest don't...wierd!

ON-TOPIC ALERT!!!!!!!!

The Rule (there is only one) states:

Post anything you want to in this thread so long as it doe not relate to anything else in this thread.

[DRT]

The giraffe has a life expectancy of 20-30 years and a gestation period of 457 days. Male giraffes are, on average, 50% heavier than female giraffes.

[Andy Velebil]

After washing in hot water, some of my decanters dry very quickly. Others, in particular the one holding the Warre Quinta da Cavadinha 1986 currently being consumed, seem to acquire a ‘mist’ that takes many days to dry.

I have one decanter that does the same thing, the rest don't...wierd!

ON-TOPIC ALERT!!!!!!!!

The Rule (there is only one) states:

Post anything you want to in this thread so long as it doe not relate to anything else in this thread.

Alright dont kill me, i just got back from a bike race and the mind is a bit numb at the moment....i need a beer!

[jdaw1]

Derek’s ‟ON-TOPIC ALERT!!!!!!!!” was, of course, related to the first post.

Self-flagellation: as is this post.

(That subject continued at Drying decanters.)

[jdaw1]

Note to self: tomorrow I must phone Currys.

[jdaw1]

My wife is pregnant.

[DRT]

National Express East Coast Trains no longer serve a fruit basket to 1st Class customers on morning services. To compound this ridiculous error of judgement and degredation in basic good manners the restaraunt car has been removed from from northbound services that leave London prior to 16:30.

What on earth is the world coming to when a gentleman cannot have a fillet steak and a quarter bottle of LBV on the way home after 3 or 4 hard hours at the office?

[Glenn E.]

My wife placed 101st (out of 680) in the American Crossword Puzzle Tournament this past weekend in NYC. And was disappointed because last year she placed 56th (out of 699). And she calls me competitive.

She made one error during the entire weekend - she had to guess on one letter because neither clue (across or down) was helpful to her - and that error dropped her from 88th to 101st. Had she known the answer instead of having to guess, and answered it correctly at the time she was otherwise finished with that puzzle, she would have finished 69th.

[DRT]

Jo and I went for a curry tonight. It was very nice.

[jdaw1]

I once had a Saturday job at Dixons, a UK retailer of electronics. The name, Dixons, had been selected randomly from the telephone directory so the company is not necessarily related to the port of the same name owned by Morgan.

[Glenn E.]

It snowed this morning. Big, fluffy, white flakes. But they all melted.

[jdaw1]

I sometimes play bridge, and am writing (and subsequently editing) this post for my partner. (We aren’t very good.)

Uncontested auction.
1NT: promises 12 to 14 points, and sum square suit lengths not exceeding 48.

• 1N 2C: a multi-puppet-Staymen, asking for five-card majors. Three likely meanings: weakness takeout into diamonds; seeking a major-suit fit with NT as acceptable backup; exploring club slam.
  • 1N 2C any:
    • 1N 2C any 3C: big hand, interested in club slam. Opener to respond with club length, then if raised above 3N, cue-bidding.
      • 1N 2C any 3C 3D: opener has exactly five clubs.
      • 1N 2C any 3C 3H: opener has exactly four clubs.
      • 1N 2C any 3C 3S: opener has exactly three clubs.
      • 1N 2C any 3C 3N: opener has exactly two clubs.
  • 1N 2C 2D: opener denies five-card major.
    • 1N 2C 2D pass: thank heavens the contract is two diamonds.
    • 1N 2C 2D 2H: promises exactly four hearts, and enough strength to play 2NT.
    • 1N 2C 2D 2S: promises exactly four spades, and enough strength to play 2NT, and denies four+ hearts.
    • 1N 2C 2D 2N: natural, 11-12 points. Opener might raise to 3N.
    • 1N 2C 2D 3N: natural, responder having 13-18 points. Opener to pass.
  • 1N 2C 2H: opener has five hearts.
    • 1N 2C 2H 3D: it was a weakness takeout into diamonds. Opener must pass.
    • 1N 2C 2H other: natural.
  • 1N 2C 2S: opener has five spades.
    • 1N 2C 2S 3D: it was a weakness takeout into diamonds. Opener must pass.
    • 1N 2C 2S other: natural.
• 1N 2D: transfer to hearts, responder promising five, any strength. Opener to jump with four or five. All bidding then natural.
• 1N 2H: transfer to spades, responder promising five, any strength. Opener to jump with four or five. All bidding then natural.
• 1N 2S: relay, asking how strong is opener’s hand. Used for enquiry about 2NT or 3NT, as weakness takeout into clubs, or to express slam interest in diamonds.
  • 1N 2S either:
    • 1N 2S either 3D: slam interest in diamonds. Opener to respond with diamond length, then if raised above 3N, cue-bidding.
      • 1N 2S either 3D 3H: opener has four+ diamonds.
      • 1N 2S either 3D 3S: opener has exactly three diamonds.
      • 1N 2S either 3D 3N: opener has exactly two diamonds.
  • 1N 2S 2N: opener’s points are 12 or a disliked 13.
    • 1N 2S 2N pass: not enough for 3N, alas.
    • 1N 2S 2N 3C: opener must pass it was weakness takeout into clubs.
    • 1N 2S 2N other: natural but why would responder do this?
  • 1N 2S 3C: opener’s points 14 or a liked 13.
    • 1N 2S 3C pass: it was weakness takeout into clubs.
    • 1N 2S 3C other: natural, still looking for a four-four fit but willing to play in 3NT.
• 1N 2N: both to bid four-card suits in ascending order, bidding 3N if no more, or raising partner.
• 1N 3C: tells opener that opener can’t remember what meaning has been assigned to this bid.
• 1N 3D: tells opener that opener can’t remember what meaning has been assigned to this bid.
• 1N 3H: big hand, big hearts, slam interest. Who knows what happens next?
• 1N 3S: big hand, big spades, slam interest. Who knows what happens next?
• 1N 3N: natural, to play.
• 1N 4C: Gerber.
  • 1N 4C 4D: opener has no aces.
  • 1N 4C 4H: opener has one ace.
  • 1N 4C 4S: opener has two aces.
  • 1N 4C 4N: opener has three aces.
• 1N 4N: optional vanilla Blackwood, may be passed with a hand opener doesn’t like.
• 1N 5suit: opener to bid 7suit with both A and K, 6suit with only one, and pass with neither.
• 1N 5N: responder has 23 points.
  • 1N 5N 6N: opener has 12 or 13 points.
  • 1N 5N 7N: opener has 14 points.
• 1N 6N: opener to pass.
• 1N 7N: opener to pray.

[DRT]

A quote from the film "As Good As It Gets" (1997) staring Jack Nicholson as Melvin Udall, an obsessive compulsive author being confronted by the soppy, dreamy-eyed receptionist at his publisher's office:

Receptionist: How do you write women so well?

Melvin Udall: I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability.

[Andy Velebil]

I have a horrible case of the flu! this sucks