ThePortForum.com

Come listen to me, all you young sporting men…
No, wait, don't go away, I'm talking to you too, just hear me out.

I have mentioned to a number of you my interest in trying to organise a sporting fixture at the Oporto Lawn Tennis & Cricket Club at some point. We discussed this in a vague way with Henry Shotton when he visited also. The OLTCC has a reasonably good, reasonably permanent first XI which play some serious fixtures against other reasonably good teams. I think it would be foolish to imagine that we at TPF could get a team together that could give them a real game.

I wondered then whether the best idea mightn't be to play a team of slightly more mature men (more matched to our own Jovian statures and physiques). I propose to see if there is interest in forming a Producers' XI who could join us for a fun day at the OLTCC. Following initial consultation with the Forum's own Geoffrey Boycott, I've been persuaded that it might be best to try and aim for 2017 so that 22+ diaries can be co-ordinated.

Is this just a crazy pipe dream? Will any of us be capable of standing, let alone bowling a ball, in Summer 2017? Will anyone with a serious, busy job really want to play against a team of rotund, geekish dipsomaniacs? Does anybody else think this is worth pursuing? Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to do that?

Incidentally, I have the offer of some ringers who can actually play cricket. Including some former internationals.

djewesbury wrote:Incidentally, I have the offer of some ringers who can actually play cricket. Including some former internationals.

Well, now you say we are to be joined by Gower, Botham and Swann, I'm sure I could make an effort!

I have friends in East Sussex and N. Irish clubs who have former Pakistani and S. African senior players. Suggestion seems to be that they are up for most things. Like wine journalists.

djewesbury wrote:Incidentally, I have the offer of some ringers who can actually play cricket. Including some former internationals.

I thought you were referring to the former Belgian International known to us?


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??

I believe that is AHB's cricketing pedigree!


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Aha. Yes of course!

I think this is an excellent suggestion.

Might I suggest a date around the Sao Joao celebrations in June 2017? Most producers are around for that date so it might be possible to organise something not too serious with decent availability of opposition. Might be more difficult getting commitment from our own team, but let's at least try.

AHB wrote:I think this is an excellent suggestion.

Might I suggest a date around the Sao Joao celebrations in June 2017? Most producers are around for that date so it might be possible to organise something not too serious with decent availability of opposition. Might be more difficult getting commitment from our own team, but let's at least try.

Good plan. But to whom should the first approach be made? And by whom?

djewesbury wrote:

AHB wrote:I think this is an excellent suggestion.

Might I suggest a date around the Sao Joao celebrations in June 2017? Most producers are around for that date so it might be possible to organise something not too serious with decent availability of opposition. Might be more difficult getting commitment from our own team, but let's at least try.

Good plan. But to whom should the first approach be made? And by whom?

Got me there. How about approaching Henry for his thoughts?

AHB wrote:

djewesbury wrote:

AHB wrote:I think this is an excellent suggestion.

Might I suggest a date around the Sao Joao celebrations in June 2017? Most producers are around for that date so it might be possible to organise something not too serious with decent availability of opposition. Might be more difficult getting commitment from our own team, but let's at least try.

Good plan. But to whom should the first approach be made? And by whom?

Got me there. How about approaching Henry for his thoughts?

Another good plan. I'll send him an email.

Email sent to Henry.
Next email should really be to the Cricket Club. It would be better if I were able to speak to them in person. I think I might have to go to Porto for a weekend soon.

I'm in, but probably not for long

To ensure I am not accused of being a ringer I think it is appropriate for me to declare my cricketing credentials:

1. I have never played cricket before.

2. I throw like a girl (as those who have attended the Upper Douro left-handed lemon throwing tournament can testify).

3. I couldn't catch a cold if I tried.

4. I cannot run.

5. My hand-eye co-ordination is on a par with my throwing.

6. I sometimes know what is going on during a cricket match.

7. I know that first rule of cricket is that there are no rules, only Laws.

So, with a score of 1 from 7 am I in the running for Captain?

Perhaps if we could persuade the generation that preceded the current Directors of the British shippers to form the opposition we might have a chance of winning?

DRT wrote:I'm in, but probably not for long

To ensure I am not accused of being a ringer I think it is appropriate for me to declare my cricketing credentials:

1. I have never played cricket before.

2. I throw like a girl (as those who have attended the Upper Douro left-handed lemon throwing tournament can testify).

3. I couldn't catch a cold if I tried.

4. I cannot run.

5. My hand-eye co-ordination is on a par with my throwing.

6. I sometimes know what is going on during a cricket match.

7. I know that first rule of cricket is that there are no rules, only Laws.

So, with a score of 1 from 7 am I in the running for Captain?

Perhaps if we could persuade the generation that preceded the current Directors of the British shippers to form the opposition we might have a chance of winning?

You can bat at number 8. Perfect. And obviously your leader's mind is going to be indispensable. You are looked up to by the men.

When we are fielding can I stand at Silly Point so that someone can show me where it is?

Certainly.. It's a very good place to find out what being hit with a cricket ball feels lilke.

djewesbury wrote:Certainly.. It's a very good place to find out what being hit with a cricket ball feels lilke.

Ah, that one

No need - I am now fully informed.

DRT wrote:I'm in, but probably not for long

To ensure I am not accused of being a ringer I think it is appropriate for me to declare my cricketing credentials:

1. I have never played cricket before.

2. I throw like a girl (as those who have attended the Upper Douro left-handed lemon throwing tournament can testify).

3. I couldn't catch a cold if I tried.

4. I cannot run.

5. My hand-eye co-ordination is on a par with my throwing.

6. I sometimes know what is going on during a cricket match.

7. I know that first rule of cricket is that there are no rules, only Laws.

So, with a score of 1 from 7 am I in the running for Captain?

Perhaps if we could persuade the generation that preceded the current Directors of the British shippers to form the opposition we might have a chance of winning?

Not dissimilar to my own cricketing ability. Always described myself not as a batsmen, bowler, wicket-keeper or all-rounder but a participator! Can't bat, bowl or field with any competence. My greatest achievement was a score of 43(out) for Rayne 2nd XI aged about 16. Most of the scoring shots were to cow corner!

I guess that may qualify me to open the batting! (I sincerely hope not!)

I did complete score books as a child.....


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Hmmm; you all need definitely a barmy army too.......



I can see myself doing some sledging and have a glass of port in the stands......

regards

WS1

When I say that there is a possibility of some ringers, I am quite serious. I do not think that any of us will need to open the batting!

Wolfgang - you are officially our no. 1 cheerleader!

Do fielders have to bat and bowl as well? If yes, count me out. If no, please consider me for a fielding position. I have thrown many a ball, from snow and otherwise.

PopulusTremula wrote:Do fielders have to bat and bowl as well? If yes, count me out. If no, please consider me for a fielding position. I have thrown many a ball, from snow and otherwise.

Everyone has to field and bat. Only a few have to bowl.

So a group of mildly intoxicated older fellows who take more port than physical activity are planning on playing cricket at midsummer in Oporto. The first piece of kit to pack would be a defibrillator.

LGTrotter wrote:The first piece of kit to pack would be a defibrillator.

Don’t be silly. The first piece of kit to pack will be a corkscrew.